Transcript (en)

When did you get back? You scared me. I need you to knock. When did you get back? I got back this afternoon. And when were you gonna call me? Chris, it was kind of a rough trip. And I was tired and... Yeah, or answer one of my 47 texts. Did you know I sent 47 texts? I did, and I thought that was incredibly normal behavior. Are you mocking me? I brought you a present. Why does your status say single on your Facebook page? What? Why does your relationship status say single on your Facebook page? I was single when I set up the page. And you just never bothered to change it? I... What? I don't know how. Do I look stupid to you? No, calm down. You're asking me to believe that the CFO of Facebook doesn't know how to change his relationship status on Facebook? It's a little embarrassing, so you should take it as a sign of trust that I would tell you that. Go to hell. Take it easy. No, you didn't change it so you could screw those Silicon Valley sluts every time you got to some mark. That's not even remotely true, and I can promise you that the Silicon Valley sluts don't care what anyone's relationship status is on Facebook. Please, open your present. Your phone does work. It's Mark. Okay, this is gonna be tricky. Uh, open your present. It's a silk scarf. Have you ever seen me wear a scarf? This will be your first. Yeah. You froze our account? I did. You froze the account? I had to get your attention, Mark. Do you realize that you jeopardized the entire company? Do you realize that your actions could have permanently destroyed everything I've been working on? We have been working on... Without money, the site can't function. Okay let me tell you the difference between Facebook and everybody else We don crash ever If the servers are down for even a day our entire reputation is irreversibly destroyed Look I found users are critical Friendster has proved that Even a few people leaving would reverberate through the entire user base The users are interconnected. That is the whole point. College kids are online because their friends are online, and if one domino goes, the other dominoes go. Don't you get that? I am not going back to the Caribbean night at AEPI. Holy shit! What is wrong with you?! Did you like being nobody? Did you like being a joke? Do you want to go back to that? Hang on, hang on, hang on, hang on. That was the act of a child, not a business manager. Certainly was not the act of a friend. You know how embarrassing it was for me to try to cash a check today? I'm not going back to that life. Maybe you were frustrated. Yeah. Maybe you were angry. I was. But I am willing to let bygones. Okay, bygones, because, Eduardo, I've got some good news. I'm sorry. I was angry, and maybe it was childish, but I had to get your attention. Wardo, I said I got some good news. What is it? Peter Thiel just made an angel investment of half a million dollars. What? Half a million dollars. And he's setting us up in an office. They want to reincorporate the company. They want to meet you. They need your signature on some documents. So you got to get your ass on the first flight back to San Francisco. I need my CFO. I'm on my way. Wardo? Yeah? We did it. Ward up? Ah! You're going back there already? Yes. And also, I'm breaking up with you.